It has been a while since my last entry. As you remember, I have come to a crossroads that has me looking deep and directly into a mirror. Am I lost? I have been, and I starting to realize I do not mind being lost. My rush is the unknown, the “what ifs”, the unplanned blessings.
I am very excited to announce I studying to become a Certified RYT200 Yoga Instructor. Currently I am 3 weeks into the training and my life has completely shifted. Through meditation and yoga these past couple weeks I have physically felt all the “rubbish” I have been carrying around, torturing my temple…and for what? To add more rubbish to my soul? How did I never realize this?
I have had chronic back pain for almost 20 years! And I am not talking about the “I slept wrong” or “crick in my neck”, I am talking about the shooting electricity that paralyzes me from the waist down. The pain that has kept in bed for weeks and has been slowly disabling me I have welcomed it with open arms! NO MORE! For the first time, I am completely choosing ME! I have been listening to my body and I am committed to heal, love, and respect myself.
First MATTER of Business: “FIX MY BACK!”
I have been in deep meditation and scanning my body and feeling so much pain, tightness, knotted sensitivity under another “knot” on my lower back. I have felt disappointment under a “knot” in my neck. I am coming face to face with these demons I have allowed to take residence on my body, because (obviously) when It REALLY MATTERED – I never made time for it – and I kept on going. Continued down a toxic spiral of negativity, doubt and denial and I chose to STOP the cycle. This past week, my practice has been taken to another level and I am excited to share my vibrations. I have seen my third eye, I am able to find my light, my inhale, my exhale, my tranquility of peace in myself. A reminder that I have the gift of peace, I posess the energy of a dozen shooting stars. It is now my time to polish my treasures, build my tribe and start living with no blockage. Saying farewell to ego, embarrassment, ungrateful, and dishonesty. (wow that was NOT easy to write – realizing all the lies I have lived.) All that ends TODAY! I can do this!
During my yoga classes, it has become quiet apparent, how “not flexible I am”! And I am accepting full responsibility, but I will accept this responsibility with patience and repetition for improvement. I am slowly molding myself into a new ME! NEW YEAR! NEW YOU! (not to mention I will be turning 40!)
Con Amor Siempre,